Envy

Why is that the thing we feel like we want or need the most is the thing we cannot have? Sometimes we don't even realize we want or need this thing until it is unavailable. This scenario plays out daily in the lives of Gimli and Virginia. We've got probably 5 or 6 dog bones around the house at any given moment. But for some reason, the only one that matters to the dogs is the one that the other dog is chewing on at that time. I'll hold another bone out for them, and it just isn't good enough even though it is the exact same thing! Looking in from the outside, its easy to think, "What is wrong with these crazy dogs?!" But the truth is, I often do the same thing.

I cannot count the times each day that I look at someone else and think, "I wish I had that", or "I wish I looked like that", or "Why can't my life be like theirs?" I so often compare my life to others and instantly find thousands of problems in my oh-so-blessed life. When I step back and look at myself with this sort of attitude, one name comes to mind: Veruca Salt. You know Veruca- the little girl in "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" who was always whining and complaining about what she didn't have, when she was the wealthiest and most privileged child of the bunch? Her motto: "Don't care how- I want it now!" She is absolutely the last person in the world I want to emulate, but that is exactly what's going on in my heart. I have been given so very much, yet here I go thinking about all the things I don't have (yet I continue to still live- imagine that!), and whining to God about what he has withheld from me. He has not withheld anything! I live in a country where I can be a Christian and no one will put me in jail. I've got the Bible translated in hundreds of different ways, commentaries, study guides, podcasts by the best preachers in the world- all at my fingertips! There are still millions of people in the world who don't have the Bible translated in their language, let alone multiple translations. Not to mention the millions who have yet to have a missionary visit them- they know nothing of Jesus yet. How on earth can I say God has withheld anything from me? I have a car. I have a job. I have a wonderful husband who adores me and values me as an equal human being. I have indoor plumbing and electricity in my home. I am filthy rich compared to the way most of the world lives today. Yet I still can find many things I don't have that I "need". Shame, shame, shame on this hideously ugly attitude of entitlement!

Gimli and Virginia aren't people and don't know better, but I do. I have no excuse for any hint of entitlement in my heart. The best way to combat entitlement is through refocusing our minds to thankfulness. When I am tempted to complain about what I lack, I try to remember all the things I have. It doesn't take long to realize how unbelievably blessed I am, and how God has been so ridiculously kind and generous to me. I am praying that God would not allow even a hint of envy to linger in my heart unchecked. I don't have time to complain when so many need to hear the message of Christ, and I have so much to learn about Him. I am praying that those 2 things- knowing Him and making Him known- become my motivation for all I do, and that I don't waste precious time and energy focusing on myself.